McCappo's Health Situation

Last weekend I drove to Naval Station Great Lakes for a pre-commissioning physical.  They had the gall to order me not to eat for 12 hours preceding the physical.  After our blood work (there were five future submariners in total), we all decided a celebratory trip to the friendly on-base McDonald's was in order.  Following my McChurger and McDouble (I was feeling a might peckish having not eaten since the day before), I reported for the second part of my physical. 

This second part happened to include an EKG.  As I lay on the table with electrodes wired to my nipples, I wondered what was taking so long.  After the operator called in the technician and then the doctor, I got a little worried--worried I wasn't going to get out in time to hit the McDonald's up before it closed.  They asked me if I had any chest pain.  Of course I said no.  I exercise my arteries regularly by forcing them to overcome copious amounts of McDonald's.  I may not be a cardiologist, but as I understand it, whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger.  So I figure my heart is probably about as strong as a small whale's.  Anyway, they finally told me what was going on. 

EKG - Showing signs of mild infarction

"It say's you've had a heart attack." 

Well this was news to me.  You would think I would know if I'd had a heart attack.  They agreed; I should have noticed if I had had a heart attack.  Upon further assurance that I had not had a heart attack, they decided to send my EKG results to the cardiologist who would look over it further.  Having not heard back from them, I'm assuming they're feeling mighty silly right about now and don't want to mention how they thought I had a heart attack.

Don't worry folks, I assure you I am fit as a fiddle and my off-season training regiment is as rigorous as always (I scored an Outstanding Low on my Physical Readiness Test and a Second Class on my Combat Fitness Test, a mere 3 seconds shy of First Class).  I promise I will be ready to go by next season and regardless of what the analysts say, I should be everyone's number one pick in their fantasy drafts next year.

I'm lovin' it,

McCappo

Angus Snack Wrapping it Up

As you already heard from McGomez, we got snowed on our final game.  Both the Ypsi and Carpenter McDonald's shut us down.  But that doesn't mean it wasn't an all-in-all successful season...well, maybe it wasn't what I'd hoped for...alright, the reason I'm not writing till now is I've been FURIOUS.  We had so much potential, we were playing great and just waiting for our big break.  And we couldn't even get an at-bat on the last day of the season.  While I'll let McHoff break down the economic estimates, here are some of the stats you've been waiting for:

PLAYER AVERAGES!!!

As you can see, McKyle started off smokin' and just caught fire down the stretch.  He had a league leading .333 average.  I gave him a run for his money hitting .318, while McGomez, after falling off his early season pace, still held it together enough to beat the league average at .278.  And then there's McHoff.  The coaches just kept waiting for this salty vet  to live up to his potential, but he never recovered batting a lowly .116 that makes even Mario Menodza cringe.  Regardless, the team's off-season training still helped us keep a .265 average throughout the season.

Item Breakdown

As you can see, the Entrees did have a higher winning percentage.  Our theory that winners are on more expensive items is still possible, even though they have the lowest profit margin for McDonald's.   I mean, if I were McDonald's, I wouldn't want to see someone win a $1,000,000 on a medium coke.  I want a picture for the news of a happy customer taking a bit out of a Big Mac with a giant grin on his (or her) face.  However, another theory we came up with was that McDonald's front-loads the winners.  That is to say, they put more winners in the earlier batch of items so that players get excited by winning and keep coming back throughout the promotion.  You'll have to see what happens next year for conclusive evidence.

This Player's Opinion

After a season that started out with so much promise but fell apart down the stretch, I'm sure you're all wondering, what are the experts taking away from the season?  Personally, I think I was robbed.  I mean, I led in hits 36 to 16, I won online wins racking up an amazing 1800 coke points, and I had an impressive .318 average, barely missing the Triple Crown because McKyle had an unbelievable year.  That's a hall of fame season if I've ever seen one.  And all I got from McDonald's was a $5 Walmart gift card and I got to taste the McRib a week early?  Really McDonald's?  That's what you're going to give the league MVP (at least, I think I was the MVP, we're still waiting for the votes to be cast)?  They couldn't at least toss me a $50 win?  A Shell Gas Card?  Nothing?

Anyway, moving on: as many of you may have seen, McEve Treoh requested an interview with the team for a piece on McDonald's Monopoly for NPR's Marketplace.  You may be upset to see that we did not end up on Marketplace.  Following the McDonaldopoly's depressing performance in the midterm elections (receiving only 4 votes for the Circuit Court Judge in Michigan's 36th Precinct), we thought this was the perfect opportunity to rebound in the public's eye.  However, following our initial enthusiasm, we looked a little further.  After consulting Reuters, we found that this wasn't quite the opportunity we initially thought.  In fact, 47% of Marketplace's listeners refuse to eat at McDonald's, 63% don't know what a "McChurger" is, and a whopping 97% don't think McDonald's is synonymous with America.  We just couldn't accept an interview with such a hostile audience on such short notice.  We'd had to have prepared a defense, counter-arguments, and we'd just have needed a larger support base before charging into the Lion's Den like that.  Again, McEve, we greatly appreciate the offer, and perhaps next year, upon building up our support, we will gladly embrace your challenge.

So with that folks, I wrap up my Senior Season with the University of Michigan McDonaldopoly team.  I'm looking forward to the draft and have high hopes that I can continue my success in the pros.  Take care and keep playing.

I'm lovin' it,

McCappo

The End of the 2010 Season

Whenever you start something as far-fetched as McDonaldopoly, it's hard to tell what will come of it. Will anybody read it? Will they think it's funny? Will they follow us? Will anybody care?

As I recount the past month of McDonald's Monopoly, I realize that I gained so much more than the memories of driving to our home "Stadium" 10 minutes until close every night, ordering 20 medium waters + $17 of free food we won off of the previous week's trips, and returning home to pull our game pieces. Actually, that's all I gained because I had been playing 2 hours of water polo everyday so I burned off all those calories. Hey, how ya feelin' McHoff, McKyle, & McCappo?
Over the weekend, I traveled to Purdue University for a water polo tournament, and my other team stopped off at a McDonald's in La Grange, IN on the way down. Mind you, it was the final weekend of the granddaddy of all McPromotions, and the La Grangians came in droves for the occasion. This provided a very positive atmosphere to play in, which is key when you're playing a road game. While they denied me a medium water purchase, they couldn't hinder the rest of my plays, as I went 2-3 amongst the Hoosiers to bring my season average up to a respectable .274.

Upon returning to the Dirty Deuce (Ann Arbor for our out-of-state readers), I met up with the team for one final match on Monday, November 1st - the last day of McDonald's Monopoly 2010.

Having learned a few days earlier that the Stadium McDonald's had "run out" of medium drinks with monopoly pieces on them (I wonder why?), we turned to the Ypsi McDonald's for our last hurrah.

After we each put in our orders for our last batch of free food items we had won, McCappo asked for "20 medium waters, please."

"Whaaaaat!?!?!?"

The cashier clearly had not been briefed on our high skill levels, but he put in the order nonetheless. After we got through the paying portion of the journey, we headed for the pick-up window, where we were greeted by 20 small waters. Aw, hell no.

So we drove back around to clarify the situation only receive 20 medium waters sans pieces from quite the unappreciative worker. After all we have done for McD's, we are still getting grief from them. I'm telling you, they should seriously consider adopting a McDonald's version of the Starbuck's gold card just for us - we've earned it.

We actually tried going to the Washtenaw McDonald's after our disheartening Ypsi visit, but we were unable to obtain any pieces there, either. With our resources all dried out, we came to a sad conclusion: our run...was done.

I'm gonna let the McOthers handle the final statistical breakdown of this season, but I would like to turn your focus (for now) towards next season. As such, I would like to introduce to you...

McGOMEZ's TOP 5 PREDICTIONS FOR 2011 McDONALDOPOLY:
1) McHoff will rebound from his disappointing 2010 campaign only to have his highlight reel pull of Ventnor Avenue voided after the tapes reveal he had worked in an area McDonald's over the off-season.

2) McKyle will retire at the end of the season when rehabbing his every-growing hips proves to be more difficult than initially assumed. However, midway through the 2011 season, when McChieber - McKyle's replacement - is charged as an accessory to the Hamburglar's horrendous Harrisburg Happy Meal Heist, McKyle Brett Farves it out of retirement to bat .387 down the stretch.

3) McCappo, upon overcoming his addiction to McDonald's, becomes a spokesperson for the fast-food awareness organization Cholesterol Unawareness is Maddening...and no one really believes him.

4) McGomez tries to overcome his PR flap in 2010 (see Frygate) by batting over .400 for the first 3 weeks of the season. However, a visit to a local improv comedy show ends in a busted gut for McGomez and an abrupt ending to his fairy tale season. However, his pre-injury performace regains his favor with the fans and his jersey sales go through the roof.

5) We still won't understand why we are doing this.

Well, that's the end of the 2010 season. I hope you enjoyed watching as much as we enjoyed playing. Don't leave us just yet, though, because there is plenty of shocking statistical analysis to follow. In addition, stay tuned as we are sure to explore other easy-to-obsess-over activities until the start of the 2011 McDonaldopoly season.

Ba Da Ba Ba Baaa,

McGomez

Happy Halloween!

Happy Halloween from the crew!!!

Day 24: Down the Stretch We Come

With my 1-game suspension served, I was back in action this past Tuesday, and was eager to show my disgruntled fans that McGomez was fully committed to this team. Unfortunately, I didn't experience the level of support I had enjoyed before Frygate. During every single one of my pulls, I was serenaded with a bevy of boos. Though I am a professional, the insistent heckling took a toll on my psyche and adversely affected my play.

I went an unfortunate 0-6 in my first game as a cleared man, dipping my season average to a very pedestrian .267. I know I have had an up and down first full season, but I am the youngest member of the team chock full of potential. McCappo and McKyle are wily veterans, but the truth is, they are on the downside of their careers, and their numbers will drop.

Just look at the eldest member of the team, McHoff. Last season, as a ripe, young 21-year-old, McHoff held a team-leading average of .354 - a full .250 above this years average (.104 through 10/28). It is clear that 21 is the peak year for McDonaldopoly players, an age currently held by both McCappo and McKyle. I am only 20, so I haven't even hit my prime. Next season, the team's going to be relying on me, and if I'm going to live up to the expectations, I will need the fans full support behind me.

Well, not ready to call this season a loss, I went back and reviewed some tape from the first few weeks (when I was pullin in the .350s) and discovered that I was a switch-pulling (first pull comes from either the left or the right game piece) back then whereas I was pulling lefty (first pull comes only from the left game piece) when I went 0-6. So I went back to switch-pulling yesterday and was rewarded for the extra time I put in, going 3-9 with 2 Snack Wraps and a McFlurry.

From a mental standpoint, it was great to follow up my most disappointing performance of the season with a solid performance. However, as we enter the stretch run, I plead to the fanbase to fully support the McDonaldopoly team in our quest for success. How can you do that? I'm going to tell you:

McGOMEZ's TOP 5 WAYS TO SUPPORT McDONALDOPOLY
DOWN THE STRETCH:
1) Change your name on Facebook (or MySpace, Xanga, Livejournal, etc.) to include the "Mc" prefix. For example, "Barack Obama = Barack McObama," "Mickey Mouse = Mickey McMouse," "Ronald McDonald = Ronald McMcDonald."
2) Donate $0.24 (via the paypal link at the top of the page) to the team towards the purchase of medium waters. We've been spending way too much money on McDonald's this month and could use the financial support.
3) Go to McDonald's and order 4 medium waters per person. This will show McDonald's that no one is fading down the stretch, and everyone is behind the McDonaldopoly Movement.
4) While you're at it, duplicate the entire McDonaldopoly team's nightly routine. At 11:30pm, pile into your "team bus" and head out to your local McDonald's of choice. After you redeem your free food items and buy your medium waters, head back home, consume your McFood&Drink, and watch reruns of Boy Meets World.
5) Be one of us for HALLOWEEN!!!!!
You could be...

McCappo





Look how happy he is!







McGomez





Just a little slurp-slurp







McKyle





Guns aren't toys, McKyle, not even fake ones






McHoff



Nom nom nom

So here we are, looking at the end of a very exciting season, with the best yet to be played. How will it all turn out? You'll have to stay with us until the very not-so-bitter end. While McHoff and McCapppo will be holding down the home Stadium, McKyle will be attacking the Minnesota region while I shall be going after the Indiana. And it's Halloween weekend, as well, so it should be a frighteningly good time.

Ba Da Ba Ba Booo,

McGomez

Day 22: Big Hearts and Big Wins

Well folks, we're one day closer to the end of a solid season, but the team is still out there, every night, giving it our all.  And sometimes, after those days where we just don't do as well as we had hoped, it's important to us to know our fans are still there, cheering for us, day in and day out, rain or shine, hot or cold.  And I happened to have one of those days just two days ago:

Rare book that actually is as good as cover.

Ever since a young boy, I have loved McDonald's.  I frequented it from cradle, and hopefully to the grave (which could be any day now, considering how much I eat).  And through all my trips to Mickey D's, I did my best to sample their wider variety of delicious, (semi-)nutritious, food.  But believe it or not, in my 21 years of McDonald's patronage, I had never tried a classic.  I had never tried the Filet-O-Fish.  I mean, can you blame me?  They look disgusting.  Not to mention with the stories of mercury deposits building in tuna and the research linking mercury with Alzheimer's?  But upon further research, I found out that McDonald's uses, good, clean, endangered New Zealand Hoki and some Alaskan Pollock.  And my mother always taught me, don't judge a book by it's cover (unless it's the one to the right, because that book actually is as good as its cover).  Plus, McDonald's has never steered me wrong before, despite appearances.  So, a couple days ago, with pressure mounting, I decided to try the Filet-O-Fish, knowing I should eat every item with Monopoly pieces at least once.  And it tasted pretty good.  McDonald's did it once again.  But wait.  I thought it was good, and everything was going well.  Shouldn't I be rewarded for trying a new item I had avoided for decades?  But no, I was not rewarded.  In fact, I was punished for going so long without trying it.  I went 0 for 5.

So I came home, slightly down in the dumps.  And to both my delight and surprise, what did I find?  If it wasn't a faithful fan, showing his support, even after such a disappointing outing.  McWolken had donated to the team $0.24 to buy a medium water (note the button on the side of the page).  Through his kindness, I rallied.  I felt rejuvenated, knowing the fans still cared.

So the next day, striking out for the home stadium with the team (McGomez was serving his 1 game suspension), I knew I couldn't let McWolken down.  Coming up to the drive-thru, I went for it.  I ordered a Big Mac meal (again, a rare item for me, but I wanted to eat everything with pieces on it), with large fries, medium drink, and 4 medium waters.  The rest of the team placed their orders.  We got our food and headed home for the conquest.  And boy howdy, did McWolken's faith pay off.  I started off a stunning 3 for 3, with 2 medium fries, and a McFlurry.  And this time McDonald's did reward my change of routine, by giving me another medium fry on the Big Mac, capping the evening at 4 for 7 and putting me back in contention for the triple crown.  Not only did I go 4 for 7, but McWolken pinch hit for a McFlurry win as well, going 1 for 1 on his donated water.  What a stellar evening.

So fans, here's to one of your own.  I'd like to personally thank McWolken for rallying me when I was feeling down and I'd like to challenge all the rest of you to match him.  Help out the team.  Show your support and donate a water.  It's not the $0.24, but the thought that keeps us going.

I'm lovin' it,

McCappo

McLated Belated

In yesterdays post I failed to mention a special day for one of our own. McHoff was celebrating his big 22nd yesterday. I wish him a happy belated McBirthday and hope our followers do the same!

Ba da ba ba ba
Happy McBirthday McHoff

A McMan, His Explaining, and a few McStories...The rare McKyle Post

McFans, McEnemies, and McTeamates:

I'd like to start by thanking you for sticking with the team through this arduous month. I realize I have not been carrying my weight throughout this process. And I, like Lucille Ball, have "some 'splainin to do."



To start, I do not wish to get into the details of my domestic issues, but I would like to ensure everyone that there was no police involvement, everyone involved is okay, and there will be no separation. There was some miscommunication to the public is all. There was a tragic event and it required my fullest attention. That is the reason I have been MIA for the past week. But I would like to announce that I am no longer on the bereavement list, and I am officially with the team again as of today.

Just as a side note, McGomez can affirm how out of commission I've been with this BL stint. We haven't even played a single EA Sports mini-game in nearly two weeks! That is an impressive feat. (EA Sports. Its in the game. (Official Sponsor of McDonaldopoly))




McConflict

Now that I have that weight off my shoulders I have some real blogging to get jiggy with. Prior to my time on the BL I was really stepping my game up. I felt like I was hitting my stride mid-month right as we hit playoff time. I made a brilliantly 4-4 solo trip to the old home field. I could cut the tension with a knife when I walked back into our old stomping grounds all alone (one of those McDonald's plastic knives of course, its not like there was that much tension).

I took one step in and they were eying their water cups. It was apparent that they were watering up their mouths to get ready to start spitting in my food. But I was prepared to keep a watching eye over my food preparation. So I walk up to the counter confidently, with a fire in my eye. This McWorker couldn't keep up with my ordering pace. I came out firing on all cylinders. "Give me a 10-piece with a Large Fry, please." She had a rough start as she entered the 10-piece in as a Big Mac (buttons aren't even close to each other on the register) and put it is as a medium fry. But before she could even correct herself, "And could I get a few waters with that, but maybe in medium cups instead of small? Make it 4." Here is when they caught up with me.

The manager made a register visit to help out the young starting cashier. He made some comments about her register form and button work that got her fixed up real quick. Then she asked him about the waters, and he stood firm on the franchise line, "If you want Monopoly pieces you will have to pay full price for those cups." From there a light discussion ensued. I'm sure if the team were there the benches would have cleared, but I knew when I was outnumbered and had to back down once the assistant manager came to the front. I changed my order to a medium coffee and then decided to just use a free smoothie to go along with it and really stick it to them.

Now while all of this was going on a large line began to build up behind me (They only had one register open since this McDonald's does relatively little business since we took our team to the new ballpark.) While I was waiting for my food I kept one eye on those dirty McWorkers and one eye on the competition on my side of the counter. These guys must have been some minor-league hopefuls the way they were ordering. They were ordering large drinks with the thought that they had pieces, they were trying to redeem breakfast sandwiches at 8:30 at night, they were taking time to decide what they wanted! Who doesn't know what they want at McDonald's? It was laughable seeing these guys try to follow my night. They each spent roughly $6 and got an average of 4 total pieces.

Again, it was too bad this was a solo trip or something might have been going down at this McDonald's that night. After my heated discussion with the manager and the McWorker they were not feeling this team. And to be honest, I was not feeling this team either. But my food finally came, I clenched my bag and got out of there before things started getting twittered and Facebooked via their mobile devices.

To get to the point. I ended up with a 4-4 night that night. I pulled wins off both sides of my fry, a win off my nuggets and a win off of the coffee. This night rocketed my average to the top of the team. At the time McGomez was still leading the league, but I decided to get into this batting title race for real and he backed down quickly (because he is a good guy, not because he isn't a man or anything like that). Although McCappo quickly put his hat in that race as well and McGomez has recently decided to reenter that race with some great performances). Sadly for me, only McCappo has a shot at the triple crown (online wins, wins, and average) as I have had a dismal online performance and cannot match his enthusiasm in number of attempts.

Giving Back to the McCommunity

So during my busy week I did get out to a game one time. I made a solo breakfast trip out at north campus (it was a long road stand between going to the old home park and the North Campus McD's for the first time) prior to a big day of tests, interviews, and family business. Clearly with all of that stuff going on, I was wearing a suit and working on my computer during this breakfast endeavor. Because of my confidence even at the away McD's, a homeless man assumed I was the manager of the store. He approaches me asking if I own this place. While I was clearly feeling like I owned the place I did not hesitate to tell the elderly fellow that I am not an affiliated worker with McD's (you never know when it is really a league investigator checking for cheating).


Anyway, I get into a conversation with the fellow only to find out he was "a former boxer ranked 10th in the world for the welterweight division." But things haven't gone his way lately since being attacked by Iron Mike's Tiger in his stand in position on The Hangover and after President Obama and him had lunch and he hit on Michelle. While his stories sounded outlandish, I decided I trusted his character. I asked him what was up and he sat down next to me telling me how he is just trying to get some money together for food. Well, my two hash browns and a coffee had earned me a breakfast sandwich that morning, and lets be honest, I have enough of those. So I tell this gentleman he is welcome to my free breakfast sandwich if he felt so inclined. At this point he tells me he doesn't know what McD's Monopoly is. I was appauled, so I gave this man the most important education a homeless person needs: how McDonaldopoly works. He was somewhat appreciative but was more interested in cash (assuming for McDonald's, but admittedly it could be for booze). The man went to get his sandwich and I quickly packed up my computer and got the hell out of there.

Why are you telling us this McKyle? I'm sure that is what you are all asking. Well this is the lesson that McDonaldopoly needs to teach us all. While the prizes are fun, the food is delicious, and the heart attacks are not until the future, it is really about giving back. When you see someone in need of a sandwich, a fry, some grease, don't hesitate to give up one of your pieces. There are those that are less fortunate out there, and they deserve McDonaldopoly fun too! This game isn't about collecting everything for yourself...oh wait. Yes it is! Damnit! I can't believe i messed up so much. It is McDonaldOPOLY not McDonaldOMMUNISM! Forget what I've said everyone. No one contribute to anyone else, keep it all for yourselves. Like Ash used to say, GOTTA CATCH 'EM ALL!

Ba Da Ba Ba Ba
I'm lovin' being back!

McPhotos

Here are a few photos from our escapades from two nights ago.....

A team shot (sans McKyle, suffering from McGirlfriend problems). From Front: McHoff, McCappo, Filet-O-Gedeller, McGomez.

The aftermath.... half of the cups had already been sent to the drying racks at this point.

McGomez Issues Public Apology

Today, I made a blog post that went against everything McDonald's, Monopoly, & McDonald's Monopoly stand for. Furthermore, my post went against my team, my teammates, & all of the dedicated fans of McDonaldopoly. While there is no excuse for my statements, all I offer is my sincerest apologies and the hope that I can regain the trust of each and every one who was affected by my transgression.

No one cares more about this team more than I do, but my actions earlier today did not reflect my level of dedication. My remarks came off as ungrateful and disloyal, and for that, I am deeply regretful. The comments were made out of desperation and do not align with my true feelings about McDonald's, my team, and the fans.

I met with team management earlier today and have apologized behind closed doors to my teammates. And I am extremely fortunate to have such great teammates, for they have decided to allow me to continue to be a member of this great organization. For my transgressions, I have been fined a "Free Breakfast Sandwich" and have been suspended from a future contest. While I never like to miss playing the game that I love with the team I would go to battle for, I will face my punishment like the man I must be.

This time has been very hard on myself, my family, and the entire McDonaldopoly organization, but before we all move past this unfortunate time, I would like to apologize once more to everyone who was affected by my carelessness. To the Stadium McDonald's crew, the McDonaldopoly organization, and most importantly, the fans of McDonaldopoly, I am truly sorry for the comments I made earlier today. And believe me when I say that I'm Lovin' It and that I Play to Win!

Ba Da Ba Ba Baaa,

McGomez

Press Release

Associated Press
22 Oct 2010

ANN ARBOR, Mich. -- Following a statement published against team wishes, McGomez has been fined by the league.  His fine is one "free breakfast sandwich" game token.  He is reportedly scheduled to meet with league officials as well as team management later today.

Day 18: Talking 'Bout Feelings

I've gone to McDonald's three times since my last blog and I've gotta say, it's starting to wear on me. As you may have gathered from my previous posts, I was an eager up-and-comer this season and, a la Brennan Boesch, enjoyed some impressive early season results. Like any great performer, though, getting to the top was easy, but sustaining that success has proven to be much more difficult.

On Tuesday, when McCappo and I went out to get our hands on the elusive McRib but, as some of you may have heard, my average slid 48 points, dropping me from 1st to 3rd on the team. One bad outing has left me just a smidge above .300 - 0-7 nights can do that to ya. While I acknowledge that my season average is better than the MOPA (McDonald's Overall Predicted Average), I'd be lying if I said I wasn't concerned.

Lately I've been having some really strange urges - or lack thereof. Like the other day, I was thinking about redeeming one of my free medium fries, but chose to abstain because the fries weren't appealing to me. Additionally, I saw a Subway ad on TV and my mouth began to water just looking at their $5 Footlong. These strange and new thoughts are definitely messing with my game. How could they not? They're distracting. I mean, there was no way that I was going to actually go out and get Subway, but I was kind of attracted to [the ad]. Wanting Subway is wrong; I like McDonald's. Just not...all the time. College is so confusing...

Anyway, last night I had a resurgence of sorts. Actually, I had one of my better nights, going 2-4 with 2 Free Smoothies. It was good to get back on track again and it was even better that the team set a new franchise record with 20 medium waters in a single order.

But then this morning, it was back to the bad. I went 0-2 on my first two hash browns of the season, and that wasn't even the worst part. I redeemed one of my free breakfast sandwiches (a Sausage & Egg McMuffin) and I was utterly disgusted by it. I didn't like it and I didn't feel like myself when I was eating it. I couldn't figure out what was going on with me. All of these weird feelings about the McDonald's that I was supposed to like were messing me up. That's when I turned to the internet for some answers.

I joined some forums, went into some chat rooms, even asked Yahoo! Answers a few questions. Fortunately, there were a lot of people out there who have gone through exactly what I'm going through now. It's really comforting to know that you aren't alone in this world.

I started emailing "Pat," who works at an H&M in San Francisco. Pat grew up in Garden City, home of the first dine-in McDonald's in the world, and said that, as a result, there was tremendous pressure put on everyone in the town to like McDonald's. Pat wasn't like the other children in Garden City, though. Sure, Pat liked eating out as much as the next kid, but simply preferred pizza to burgers and fries. One day, Pat told Pat's parents that they liked Little Caesar's more than McDonald's - and they flipped. Pat's dad kicked Pat out of their house and Pat's mom wouldn't stop crying. As a result, Pat ended up having to shack up with Pat's older sister, Morgana, in SF where Pat's been ever since. It was a sad tale, but Pat told me that everything gets better once you're honest with yourself and that life's never been better.

Pat's story would have helped me out, save for the fact that I don't like pizza. Pizza to me is kind of like McDonald's: I eat it fairly often, it's a big part of my life, but I don't actually like it. And that's when I came to this conclusion: my life is filled with things I don't really like, and I just need to man up and deal with it. Wait a second, do I smell another list?

McGOMEZ's TOP 5 FAVORITE THINGS
HE DOESN'T ACTUALLY LIKE:
1) Spending Time With People: I get lonely sometimes, but then when I'm around other people, all I want to do is go back to my room and make songs with my viola and a cup filled with rice by myself
2) Movies: They intrigue me, but then I can't sit still after the first 20 minutes
3) Pizza: It's a staple in every lower to upper-class male's diet, but I don't like cheese, I don't like sauce, and I don't really like the crust
4) McDonald's: I'm going there like 6 times a week and writing a frickin' blog about McDonald's, but I hate greasy food and am unimpressed with their french fries as of late
5) Nutri-Grain Bars: They're so convenient when you're looking to eat something filling when I'm on-the-run, but the grains get stuck to the roof of my mouth and in my back molars

Yeah, so I'm probably overreacting during the dog days of the season. I know the team needs my head to be in the right place so I can perform well and that I've still got some good, injury replacement all-star stats to fall back on. I have to stop being so emo. I've just got to learn to ignore that damn temptress, Subway. I've come TOO FAR to let a stinkin' footlong shorten my success.

Ba Da Ba Ba Baaa,

McGomez

P.S. That picture of the girl wearing the "$5 Footlong" shirt doesn't make any sense...at least, I hope not.

Mr. McMoneybags Approves

All American's share two defining traits:

1. they love to eat McDonalds
2. they love saving money

I am proud to say that the McTeam has been following this two point ideology for our entire lives, but it is just been in the last month that we have expressed our views to the world. This blog post will focus on how the McDonaldopoly team keeps to a tight budget and acts to maximize their expected value while dining at McDonalds multiple times daily.

First, lets look at a breakdown of what items the team orders. You can see in the graph below that the McMedium water is far and away the most ordered item.

We order the McMedium water so frequently because the item actually has a positive expected value. For those of us who are not statisticians, this means that by shelling out 24 cents for the water, we are actually expected to make more money than this in return, in the form of free food, pogo subscriptions, Wal-mart gift cards, etc. The chart below shows the Expected value, or EV, (calculated using a sample size of over 400 pulls) of each of the four most commonly order items.

Lets now work through a practical example of what this all means to make sure everyone understands. You can see from the chart, that a McMedium water has an EV of almost 50 cents. This means that by going in and purchasing the water for 24 cents we will on average walk out with 74 cents of goodies.  You can also see that the other items all have a negative EV. Take a large fry for example: it costs 1.99 but has an EV of about -20 cents. This means that you will walk out of McDicks with about 1.79 in prizes for every large fry you buy. Not bad if you ask us, but its no McMedium water.

It is clear that the waters offer the best value; however, the large fry is not far behind boosted by its 4 pulls/item. The team obviously advocates the waters for their great EV and health benefits, but, by no means are the large fries a bad buy. Of course, sometimes you need an actual meal, in which case an entree is reasonable (assuming you would purchase it anyway), but it is still more economically savvy to buy medium waters and a couple McDoubles.  When playing McDonald's Monopoly to win, the team advocates avoiding all items other than medium waters (assuming they are priced accordingly) or the occassional large fry, if you're feeling lucky.

Finally, you may ask ...how have we fared so far? Well I do not want to ruin the end of year surprise, but I can offer a small teaser with our current data. The team has so far racked up over 60 dollars of net winnings on McMedium waters and is close to breaking even overall. With the team trending towards a larger percentage of McMedium waters, we fully expect to be in the black by seasons end. The chart below shows how we have fared on only a few select items (the rest of the item data will be released at the end of the season).

Your Mendoza line hitter,

McHoff

Day 18: A McRib Round-Up and Other Adverntures

McRib Round-Up

That's right, you did read correctly.  I said McRib.  As some of our faithful facebook followers may have seen, the McRib is returning from its 17 year hiatus November 2nd.  However, a few select locations have been chosen for early release, including our very own home stadium.  McDonald's rewarded the team in a way much bigger than a free medium fry last week when they brought the McRib to Ann Arbor.  And we weren't about to let this opportunity go to waste.  So here's the promised round-up:

McGomez and myself set out one night for our standard 5 to midnight McDonald's run.  (11:55 being the perfect time for a late-night run, as he has worked up an appetite at water polo and we get there just before close to give a warm goodnight to some of our favorite stadium employees.)  And to our surprise and delight, we hear a different pre-recorded greeting.  "Welcome to McDonald's, now featuring the McRib Value Meal.  Please order when ready."

Well, being the seasoned veterans we are (my seasoning is a little bit of salt, with a pinch of paprika and pepper, while McGomez is a spicy tabasco marinade, with onions), we are always ready by the time we hit the drive-through speaker.  But McDonald's just threw us a huge backdoor curve on a 3-2 count when we were expecting fastball all the way.  We can't get a few McDoubles and our token 8 medium waters now.  But we hang in there and throw the bat out.  Starting with the unchanged, I order a small McFlurry (free, of course), and our 8 medium waters.  We make contact, fouling it off we stay alive.  While I've been ordering, McGomez had time to think.  Now, the pay off pitch comes: we order 2 large McRib value meals (with medium drinks of course).  *SMACK*  It's going back, back, oh, lands short of the wall, but we're in there with a stand up double.  No fairy tale ending here folks, only a double.  No home run.  The McRib was pretty good.  Some sort of processed pork sausage-ish meat, shaped into ribs, covered in barbecue sauce, with pickles and onions, on a roll.  The sauce was the real let down here.  Had they splurged for a better quality barbecue sauce, the sandwich could have been great.  Instead it was just really salty, slightly slimy, with pungent aroma.  But you don't even have to chew hash browns; the grease lets them slide right down you're throat.  And they're delicious.  So I wouldn't discount the McRib just because of a little slime.  All-in-all, it's an experience I'm proud of, happy to have under my belt, and I may throw the McRib in every now and then as a change of pace while it lasts, but it's not going to replace the standard McDouble + McChicken order any time soon.

Now a short pause for station identification:

This is McDonaldopoly: I'm Lovin' It, broadcasting out of Ann Arbor, Michigan.  Follow us at McDonaldopoly.blogspot.com or on Facebook.  Tell all your friends.  And remember, I'm lovin' it.

Now back to our regular programming:

As promised, the other adventures:

A New Record

Last night we had a full bus load roll out for the (almost) midnight run: McGomez, McHoff, Filet-O-Gedeller, 4 Piece Gedeller (the younger sister of Filet-O), and myself.  We rolled through and I was feeling generous so got everyone a medium fry.  And honestly, I can't spend the free fries at the rate I'm winning them; one a trip was too slow.   Then, when it came to ordering some waters, I counted up, multiplied by 4 (the carrying capacity of a drink holder) and came to 20.  So I went for it.  That's right folks, we have a new single order water record: 20 medium waters.  After a brief pause and a request for confirmation, we pulled forward, paid, and were granted 20 medium waters.  So many waters in fact, that after filling up 16, they brought in a relief cashier to finish the final 4.  And let me tell you, that starter had been throwing some heat because when we got back and peeled, our two pinch hitters and McHoff went 0 for 13 combined.  The only one who could get a hit was McGomez.  Back to form, McGomez went 2 for 4 with both wins being free small smoothies.  I was lucky, McGomez forced them to go to the bullpen, and that reliever just wasn't dishing like the starter.  Getting those last waters, I matched McGomez's 2 for 4 performance, although lacking the power.  I only had one free smoothie and a free medium fry.  Stay posted for pictures of the 20 medium water triumph.

Team Breakfast

This morning, after a good sprint and calisthenic workout, McHoff, McGomez, and McSelf went out for a McBreakfast.  Long story short, McHoff pushed for too many medium waters early in the morning and they just weren't having it.  After ruining it for all of us, he got the sole hit (an angus snack wrap), while McGomez and I went 0 for.  But we still came out ahead, factoring in the previous night's success.  McKyle is notably absent from this team breakfast.  He was benched due to personal issues, and while I am not at liberty to discuss them here, they're very similar to this.  Also, we had high hopes for a rookie, McMason, who had just been called up from the minors.  But apparently her skill and dedication hadn't increased at the rate her fitness did (she just ran a marathon), and she was unable to wake up for the breakfast.  However, we're still looking at getting her, as well as a few other prospects, including McJordan and McLiebs, a few plays by the end of the season to help them develop as we look forward to future seasons.

That's all for now but remember,

I'm lovin' it,

McCappo

Day 16: Running Stats and Terminology

Well folks, we just passed the half-way point, and because of your faithful patronage, I feel you deserve to see the full cohort of stats we've collected thus far.  But first, I feel I should fully define how we track our stats as we've had some slight misunderstandings recently.

• Win - Any pull resulting in an instant win prize (or a rare collectible piece, not that we've pulled any)

• Rare Pieces - In order around the board: Mediterranean Ave., Vermont Ave., Virginia Ave., Tennessee Ave., Kentucky Ave., Ventnor Ave., Pennsylvania Ave., Short Line Railroad, and Boardwalk

• Pull, Game Stamp - A single property with one code

• Game Piece, Play, or At Bat - As defined by McDonald's Official Rules, two game stamps/pulls (typically each item is one at bat, the exception being a large fry)

• Average, Win Percentage - The percentage of wins per plays (i.e. the number of winning stamps divided by the total number of stamps pulled, multiplied by two)

• Pinch Hitter - Any player who helps out the team by coming with the team on an outing and recording their stats (such as McHundo, McMike, McNeal, Filet-O-Gedeller, McLiz, McJordan and McKristen)

Now that we've cleared that up, here are the various stats:

As you can see, we love to play at home.  They treat us well there, and we respond positively.  We've played a few away series with higher win percentages, but of the 3 locations we've visited most frequently (Our home Stadium, the old Ann Arbor stadium, and Ypsi), we clearly play our best and most consistent McDonaldopoly at home.

As you can see, the fries are leading the way, but the Soft Drinks (including medium waters) are a strong contender as well.  Unfortunately our team much prefers the late night games to early morning games, so the sample sizes for the Hash Browns and McCafe's are much smaller.

Now for the stat you've all been waiting for:

 

As you can see, McGomez has fallen off his blistering pace lately, but is still batting a very respectable .300, while McHoff struggles to find the rhythm he had last year.  McKyle, batting .344, has recently taken a slim lead over myself, at .333, after taking a day off to rest.  However, I do maintain the team wins lead at 23.  But most importantly, the team as a whole is batting an astounding .301, 10 wins above the projected .250 league average.

With that I'm out.  Stay hungry McFans.

I'm lovin' it,

McCappo

Day 13: McGomez On the Road, Is a Tooth

Growing up in middle America, my family did not possess the riches necessary to afford a private hangar at the luxurious Oakland County Airport. However, like any other family trying to achieve the American Dream, we would go on vacations to see the country, sea to shining sea. And we'd get there via road trips.


That's not actually my family, but this is:


We like to think of ourselves as a more euphoric version of the Boxcar Children.

Anyway, point is I went on a road trip this weekend to America's Heartland and back. But neither my time spent in Iowa nor my pit-stop in the South Side of Chicago could match the excitement and allure of my McDonald's stop in Jackson, MI. It was the first stop my van made, but we made it count. Well, I did, anyway.

I wasn't extremely hungry at the time, but my vanmates were eager to eat, so I said to them, "why not stop at McDonald's?"

"That's quite an argument," said nobody but thought them all.

We went through the drive-thru like it was any old thing, but that's where my tale begins to unwind. It wasn't just "any old thing" - this was a huge thing.

As usual, I ordered my four medium waters. I reached into my wallet to retrieve my golden dollar (an 1854 Small Indian Head golden dollar, to be precise) but that proved to be an utter waste of time. That's right, folks: IT WAS FREE!!!

To put this into perspective...

McGOMEZ's TOP 5 FAVORITE THINGS:
1) Space Jam
2) His Mama
3) Free Medium Waters
4) Candy
5) Girls in White Dresses w/ Blue Satin Sashes

Needless to say this was pretty exciting to get my #3 most favorite thing in the world for free. If only I didn't have to pay for #5...

But that's not where the excitement ended. While I will admit I didn't have a McGomez outing that the fans have come to expect this season, I made my lone hit count. I went 1-4 with a free 3 month subscription to Pogo.com. That's a fairly valuable prize, especially when you consider that I didn't have to pay a dime to get it. Even though my season average dipped a bit, I'm still clinging to my team lead with a .348 average - both McCappo and McKyle biting at my heels.

But we're all teammates, right? There's no competition between us.
None. What. So. Ever.

And for those of you who wanted to know, I tried out my free Pogo.com subscription Saturday night in my hotel and it's not so great. Pogo is a games website where you can play board games, cards, & puzzles online against other (presumably) paying Pogoers.

Why anyone would pay for this website is beyond me. I played three hands of euchre before I quit. Every single time, someone called for a loner before it even came to me to call. That's crap.
***If you're not from Michigan, this should help you understand better***

I must have been the tooth because he hasn't looked at his cards yet and the princess, cactus, and gopher are still playing anyway.

Ba Da Ba Ba Baaa,

McGomez

Day 12: This One's For You

As all sports fans know, a team can't reach its full potential without a supportive fan base.  Just look at the Tampa Bay Rays; best record in the regular season and they lose to the Texas Rangers.  And you know why that is?  Because they have terrible fans. 

In Ann Arbor, we take McDonaldopoly seriously.  So to avoid fading down the stretch, we decided it was time we advertise ourselves a little bit in order to build our dedicated fan base.  Some people call it "whoring ourselves out in a corporate, McDonaldesque way."  I have no problem with that phrasing, but personally I would consider it "making an investment."  By spending effort now to recruit fans, those same fans will rally us when we're tired, comatose, and diabetic in late October and make sure we finish with gusto.

So now that we had a plan, how did we go about doing this?  I printed several hundred sheets of paper with our name and slogan (Mcdonalopoly.blogspot.com and "Play to win.")  But it's harder than you think to whore yourself out.  Contrary to popular believe, although we eat McDonald's 2-3 times a day, we do have dignity.  So our flyers just sat in the team clubhouse for a few days with none of us willing to peddle them on the street corner like a common two-bit hooker.  However, we decided we could post them late at night all over Ann Arbor.  Yes, it was a cop out.  But I'll be the first to admit, we were nervous.  We'd never been playing this well late into the season before and we didn't have the experience to calm us.

That's where McHoff stepped up.  He may not be leading the team in average, or even hitting above the Mendoza line, but his leadership is priceless.  He decided to take one for the team, and took a stack of flyers to a party thrown by chemical engineers.  Now, for those who don't know, chemical engineers are a sneaky bunch.  Couple that with their knowledge of the pharmaceutical industry, and you've got a wicked combination.

Now McKyle wasn't about to let McHoff go it alone, so he manned up and went with him.  So, you may ask me, "Why is McCappo writing this post?"  Well my friends, because, I'm the only one who can remember the events.  As I said before, chemical engineers are devious.  Well, McHoff and McKyle were roofied that night.  (Most likely, the roofalin was prepared in a batch reactor in the basement, before evaporating off the solvent and then being mixed with some sort of juice and alcohol to hide the taste.  This is entirely speculation as no eye-witness accounts are available from the night.)  But, without inhibitions to hold them back, McHoff and McKyle were able to distribute nearly 100 flyers.  We don't know how they were all used, but we did find several on car windshields and on our neighbors' doors the next day.

We've already seen the dividends of McHoff and McKyle's valiant efforts in our site traffic being up to about 800 people a day the past two days.  McGomez and myself already feel revitalized by the fan support and plan to increase our game play even higher.  We can't let McHoff and McKyle down after the effort they went to for the team and we certainly can't let down our loyal fans, who day in and day out, through fair weather or foul, come back to cheer on the team.

So this one's for you: the loyal fans who give us motivation to keep playing the game.  You don't let us forget what's important and why we got into this in the first place.  So go out and get yourself a Big Mac, a medium coke, a large fry, and maybe one of those free McFlurries you won, because you guys have earned it.

I'm lovin' it,

McCappo

Flashback to Day 7: A McFight

So I was going to let McHoff tell this story, but perhaps his memory is a little foggy after that last McNuggetini.  Anyway, last week we were preparing for a midnight run to McDonald's with a few pinch-hitters.  Needless to say, as it was a big football weekend, we were all a little pie-eyed (2 for $1 apple pie-eyed to be precise).

But before our McDD drove the team bus, he had to step outside for a smoke.  McHoff was excited, and chatting it up with some of the pinch-hitters on the team, he of course mentioned MCD.  Well, apparently a McBurger King fan was walking down the street, and over heard this.  I didn't even realize it was legal to prefer that place to McDonald's in this state, but apparently it is.  Regardless, McHoff threw some pebbles at him, taunting the opposition.  In response, the unshaven bum shouted back, "If you don't stop throwing those F***ing rocks, I'm going to give you a McAss Kicking!"  Boy was that the wrong thing to say.  A McBurger King player threatening MY teammate?!?!  I don't think so.

He was lucky I was inside at that point in time, because a few seconds later, after stepping outside and hearing the story, I began searching the street for him.  The team thought it was necessary to hold me back from running down the street in the direction he'd gone to see if he could cash that check for a McAss Kicking, or if he was as spurious as all the commercials for his beloved "McBurger King."

But the moral of the story is, there are some things you can make fun of people about, like appearance, intelligence, race and religion.  As Denmark has shown us, those are all fair game and everyone understands it's in the name of fun.  But do not, and I repeat do not, insult something as sacred as a McDonaldopolonian's love for the arches.

After that little life-lesson, here are the running stats:

As you can see, McHoff is charging back after his slow start.  McGomez is holding a slim lead over McKyle for the team lead in average, and I myself (McCappo) am hanging strong above .300 while holding the team lead in wins.  The pinch-hitters have been doing a great job coming off the bench this year and are helping us maintain a team average well above the league's.





I hope all our fans are having as much luck of their own at home.

I'm lovin' it,

McCappo

Day 10: Yo No Quiero Taco Bell

Today, I experienced my first taste of discriMcnation. As I was in the middle of a rabble-rousin' session of McDonaldopoly-promotion, when someone noted that "McSpic's should be going to Taco Bell, not McDonald's."

Well let me tell you, I do like Taco Bell, but only once in awhile. But McDonald's...man, that shizz is for all time.

Today we did another post-practice McD's run, which is great for me because I'm always hungry then. Only sometimes - like today - I get too hungry and jump the gun. Call me feeble, call me weak, call me Ishmael, but so what? I pre-ate the McDonald's trip. Sue me. I shouldn't be getting anything besides medium waters, anyway.

The entire team hopped into the team bus and headed over-

***THIS JUST IN: McKYLE JUST CALLED ME A McSPIC!!!!***

I am just too fuming mad to continue this post. I can't believe I've been discriMcnated against by a stranger and a teammate in the same day.

Eh, I'm over it. But it is late so I am gonna speed up this blog.

As McHoff is still peeling below the Mendoza Line - embarrassing, I know - I have been riding high ever since I took over the team lead in batting. Some might say that I let it go to my head, but as we all know, players like McGomez who have to scrap their way to the top never let their ego get in the way of the task at hand. I'm in it to win it, and damnit, no one will stop me. No way. Nope.

I will admit, today, McKyle was in the zone. He raised his season average to a respectable .364, which is good for him. However, with my personal pride at stake, I had to play extra hard tonight to remain the top performer of the season.

It was tough out there tonight. The elements were killing me, with that constant drizzle and all. I had a hard time gripping my medium waters. To top it all off, the McDonald's cashier threw us a curveball when he said they were closed. Luckily, the manager came in and sorted everything all out and allowed us to play. I fought off the adversity and was able to come away with a 1-3 night, bringin my season average at the end of the night to a marvelous .368 average!

I'm not one to brag, but to have that high of an average this late into the season is impressive for Hall of Fame-caliber players. Move over Ichiro, it's McGomez Time!

Ba Da Ba Ba Baaa,

McGomez

Mega McHoff Update

Greetings McBloggians!

I apologize in advance for my long absence from the blog. Anyways, this post will consist of three parts, for guess what??? Three McDonalds visits (the last is the best, so keep reading bitches!!)

Day 5: McNorth Campus has a McDonalds?

On a calm Friday afternoon, me and the McGirlfriend went on a date.

You may say, "McHoff, how can you keep up this McDonalds binge with a McGirlfriend?".

My response,"Tell her every McTrip is a date....and you're in the clear". Simple and Effective.

So, going to McDicks(name credit to McKunal) daily I have impressed this onto the girlfriend with amazing results. To the extent that on this Friday afternoon, she decided to treat me to a McDate. How sick is that?!? Not only am I winning free stuff, but I don't even have to buy medium waters...I can indulge in real food like Smoothies, Fries, and of course a few McDoubles.

So since she is treating she decides to take me to the classiest McDonalds in the McAnnArbor, the North Campus location. Just take a quick look at this beauty...

Exterior:

Interior:

People were even eating McNuggetinis (I am petitioning the crew to have some of these tonight)

Anyways, I digress...back to the story. We arrive at the North Campus McDonalds to find ourselves completely under dressed. Were the only poor schmucks in business casual attire. Needless to say we felt out of place enough to run to our car and hit the drive through instead. We then ordered our standard fare (no medium waters here, so although it was classy...we will not be returning) and like clockwork I went 0-fer. The McGirlfriend did get one very lucky piece. It was actually a 1/110 odds, so we were quite happy. The true McDonalopoly followers will know that this means she won a 3 month pogo subscription, but for those who need to polish up on their odds head on over to McCappo's great Price is Right Post.

Day 6: A late night surprise

This trip is surmised below:

Location: Home field, Stadium McDonald's

Time: 1am Saturday night

McLovers: McHoff, McCappo, Pinch hitter A, Designated Driver A (please McIndulge responsibly)

Transportation: 92' Subaru sedan (see figure below)

Order: Drive Through

Medium Waters: 12

Food items: 4 ( two McDoubles, one McChicken, one ten piece McNugget)

Summary: trip was an overall loss for everyone...no major winners. On the bright side, we got to drink lots of water.

Day 10: a briar in the wood

This trip is deserving of its own post for many reasons. Here is a preview of those reasons, stay tuned tonight for a full update:

• McHoff heats up
• (McHoff loves American workers)^-1...just think about it
• and....a tragic ending