Day 20: McD Wins Championships

Howdy Folks!

Like all good athletes, to truly excel at your sport, you must not be physically fit, but mentally tempered.  And to mentally be the best you must study.  But to get a step up on the competition, true McDonaldopoly All-Stars don't just study the known strategies, but they innovate, searching for untried gems others are too timid to sample.  This sometimes involves going outside our own sport and looking for inspiration elsewhere. Now as you may have realized, McDonaldopoly closely parallels baseball in many aspects.  This is the story of how I cracked McDonald's new defensive strategy in 2011.

McMoneyball: Life, McDonald's, and the Art of Saving a Nickel

Last week I went to see the excellent movie, Moneyball.  And between the shots of the pensive, aging, but still sexy Brad Pitt, I found myself paying attention to the story of the movie.  The GM of the underfunded, small market Oakland A's seeks to compete against the big boys with a quarter of their salary.  He finds that OBP is a better predictor of value than batting average, and cheaper.  And if you've followed the playoffs at all, you'll know the big guns this year have been busts.  Now it comes as no surprise A-Rod was the Yankees' final out, AGAIN, but also, pitching greats Halladay and Verlander came up short.  For those who follow statistics, you'll know that recently WAR (wins above replacement) has grown in popularity, estimating a player's value based on offense AND Defense.  And that's when I realized: McDefense wins championships.  And I'm not the only one who has realized this.  If you look at McDonald's prizes this year, they've kept their 1 in 4 wins* but take note of the asterisk.  *Mostly food prizes.  Now that's the same as last year, but other than winning almost entirely medium fries (the cheapest ARV of any food prize), they've changed the food prizes.  You can no longer win "Any beef sandwich (excludes Big Mac)" (which I liked to use on the ~$6 double quarter pounder); rather you can only win "A Quarter Pounder with Cheese."  That's half the free burger I want.  And the "Free Breakfast sandwich" is nice, but they got rid of the ~$5 Steak, Egg, and Cheese Bagel: something I had never before purchased prior to last year due to its prohibitively high cost (I lived in penury in my college years.  No McWebber scandals for me.).  And although I still don't normally buy the S.E.C. Bagel, I'd love to win one.

That timeout still gives me more of a twinge in my heart than a McChurger...

 

So how do you beat a solid McD?  With a consistent, well thought out McO.  First, stick to your tried-and-true strategies, like the McMedium water trick.  Don't let them get in your head and start changing your game plan after one or two bad outings.  Second, work cashiers late into the count.  When they get weary they give up bad singles and big hits: take advantage.  Try a McPattock. (where you wait until after the cashier has rung up your order before asking for a medium water.  They'll usually throw it in for free; they aren't going to make a separate order just for a water.)  Finally, stay positive.  This game is 90% mental and if you get down on yourself, you're as good as out already.

So with that folks, good luck, and remember...

I'm Lovin' It,

McCappo