Texas: The Home of McBeef

Hey Y'all,

McKyle here, reporting from the Beef Capital of America. I know you are all wondering why I would possibly leave Michigan after having such a fantastic (MVP caliber--if I do say so myself) rookie season. Well, folks, Texas was just offering opportunities for championships that Michigan couldn't offer me this year. Unfortunately, I underestimated the level of competition down here.

My first trip to a Texas McDong Dongs was not a successful one. Wandering about a new city, I was not sure what the best bet was for my first trip. So I ventured east of I-35, figuring it was a little closer to home than the rest. I had numerous at bats and just couldn't get my swing going early in the season.

It really is true, everything is bigger in Texas, including the odds of not winning apparently. My first order was a 10-Piece meal. But Big 12 (pound gain) country is not favorable to that Big 10-piece nation, and they made it clear in my game pieces. 6 pieces were shaped like Texas and the other 4 said "We hate you and you will lose." While at first I thought about taking this to the McDonaldopoly officials, I realized this is the kind of stuff a pro has to play through and decided to power through it. But low and behold, the nuggets spoke truth.

I went a mere 1 for 5 in game one (in addition to my meal I was able to obtain 15 cent medium waters, but more on that next). My one win was a big one though, garnering a free smoothie. But one clutch hit will not make up for 4 strike outs. This has been weighing on my mind and it might be necessary to go on the personal grievance list...but the coaches don't want wimps, so I will just have to power through.

Now to the water. I was surprised to get 15 cent waters at all in Texas, don't get me wrong. I mean, the drought we are suffering is the worst in over 100 years, so water is a scarce commodity. What really irked me though, was that the drive-thru worker refused to tell me the price until I got to the window. This certainly seems like foul play. I understand the hazing by the nuggets. I understand the dirty looks when I walk into an away McDonald's. But price hiding? Come on, that is just an unwritten rule that you don't do that. The price-hiding-gate is a tragedy to the game, and the league is investigating (not that their incompetence can manage to figure out the evidence). Whatever. Fine me....

Thanks for all the support during this rough time in my career. I have the best fans in the world. Follow me on twitter!

KThxBye!

McKyle